St. Thomas’ Episcopal Church, Owings Mills MD
November 18, 2023
The Funeral of River’lynn Cartagena
Romans 8:31-39
Psalm 23
Mark 10:13-16
God’s Heartbreak
This has been – and will continue to be - such a tender time for all of you.
It’s a time to mourn the death of River’lynn while also celebrating the arrival and survival of Summer’lynn.
And, now that we’ve met you all and you’ve given us the privilege of having River’lynn’s service here, we at St. Thomas’ now also share in your grief and also your joy.
And we are here for you, not only today, but, hopefully, long into the future, whenever you need us.
You know, when terrible things happen, it’s natural for us to ask, why?
And that’s especially true for those of us who say we are people of faith, who believe in a loving and merciful God.
If God is loving and merciful, like we believe, then why does God permit such sorrow, such loss?
Whenever I reflect on this difficult question, I think of someone who was a pretty famous pastor some years ago.
His name was William Sloane Coffin and he led a large church in New York City called Riverside Church.
Well, one stormy night, Rev. Coffin’s 24 year-old son, Alex, drove off a bridge in Boston and drowned.
A horrible tragedy – an unspeakable loss.
Amazingly, only ten days after Alex’s death, Rev. Coffin stood up in front of his congregation and offered a eulogy for his son.
He recognized that some people were, naturally enough, wondering why God would allow something so awful to happen – and, not only that, some people even believed that God had somehow been behind Alex’s swerve off the bridge and his death.
Well, Rev. Coffin was having none of that.
He stood up in front of his congregation and said something that I’ve never forgotten since the first time I read it. He said:
“…when the waves closed over the sinking car, God’s heart was the first of all our hearts to break.”
“God’s heart was the first of all our hearts to break.”
“God’s heart was the first of all our hearts to break.”
And God’s heart breaks not only for Alex and his family, but for all suffering people in a world where, unfortunately, things go wrong all the time.
At the first moment, before anyone knew what was happening to River’lynn, God’s heart broke.
And God’s heart continues to break for River’lynn and for Amanda and Edwin and for all of you, for all of us.
But, here’s the thing:
God’s heartbreak opened the just the right space in God’s heart for River’lynn – a perfectly safe space – a space with so much love – the space in God’s heart where River’lynn will spend all eternity loved and loving – the holy space where someday she and Summer’lynn and all of us will be reunited.
And, not only that, but God’s heartbreak releases so much love and grace for all of us.
And I know that these aren’t just words because I’ve met this family and I’ve seen your love with my own eyes.
God’s heartbreak releases so much love – love that is stronger than death, stronger than anything – love that you’re sharing with Summer’lynn and with each other.
God’s heartbreak releases so much grace - the grace to stick close to each other – to go on being the beautiful little village that you are – supporting, and caring for each other, now and always.
When tragedy strikes – during a tender time like this - there are no easy answers and no magic words.
But, when things go wrong, the heart of our loving and merciful God really is the first of all our hearts to break.
And God’s heartbreak made room in God’s heart for River’lynn.
And God’s heartbreak gives us the love and grace we need as we continue on our journey, together.
Amen.
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